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JURASSIC WORLD DOMINION

June 9, 2022 By Leave a Comment

JURASSIC WORLD DOMINION

At two hours and twenty-six minutes, JURASSIC WORLD DOMINION is as hefty as the ginormous terrestrial behemoths that feature prominently in it, and it is just as ungainly. It lumbers along using the intertia of its sheer mass to propel along a story that is as dedicated to calling out classics as it is to… Read More »

Tagged With: corgi-sized locusts, dinosaur, gentetically modified crops, hissy fit, industrial farming, paleontologist, raptor-whisperer, sequel, therapsid

TOP GUN : MAVERICK

May 27, 2022 By Leave a Comment

TOP GUN : MAVERICK

I don’t know if TOP GUN:MAVERICK holds the record for the time elapsed between the original and the sequel, but if waiting over three decades results in a film as terrific as this, I hope filmmakers everywhere will at least consider taking their own sweet time when making sequels. This is an adrenalin-junkie’s fantasy, tightly… Read More »

Tagged With: buff physique, cockiness, dogfight, g-force, Mach 10, Mach 9, medula oblongata, navy, sequel

DR. STRANGE IN THE MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS

May 22, 2022 By Leave a Comment

DR. STRANGE IN THE MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS

With DR. STRANGE IN THE MULITVERSE OF MADNESS, we are gifted with a thimbleful of plot in a vast expanse of cinematic ocean. This being yet another piece of the equally vast Marvel Universe, the story is obliged to take its hero, Stephen Strange (Benedict Cumberbatch), from Point A to Point B in order to… Read More »

Tagged With: Illuminati, lack of internal logic, linguine, lost love, Marvel Universe, MCU, multiverse, sequel, Sorcery, witchcraft

MEMORY

May 4, 2022 By Leave a Comment

MEMORY

Based on the delightfully quirky 2003 Belgian film, The Memory of a Killer, MEMORY has the makings of a solid neo-noir. Alas, rather than a tight script to match its excellent visual acuity, MEMORY rambles too much before leading us down the familiar path of corruption in high places and the loss of innocence across… Read More »

Tagged With: Child sex trafficker, corruption, Early onset Alzheimer's, El Paso, hitman, Mexico, pigeons in a bakery, remake, The Memory of A Killer

THE NORTHMAN

May 3, 2022 By Leave a Comment

THE NORTHMAN

Those familiar with HAMLET will find some familiar things in Robert Eggers’ THE NORTHMAN, and that is no coincidence. The source material for both is Sjón’s Gesta Danorum (circa 1200) about a prince with both mommy issues and a usurping uncle. Where Shakespeare adapted the story to his time creating an elegantly and eloquently melancholy… Read More »

Tagged With: dismemberment, fratricide, Gesta Danorum, Hamlet, human sacrifice, primal ritual, psychoactive substances, revenge, Shakespeare, Sjón, Valkyrie, visions

THE UNBEARABLE WEIGHT OF MASSIVE TALENT

April 19, 2022 By Leave a Comment

THE UNBEARABLE WEIGHT OF MASSIVE TALENT

Having starred in a deliciously odd self-portrait by and of Charlie Kaufman, ADAPTATION, Nicolas Cage has waited two decades to take the surreal meta-plunge again and waiting for just the right script has paid off for him and for us. In THE UNBEARABLE WEIGHT OF MASSIVE TALENT, he plays a fictionalized version of himself, hamstrung… Read More »

Tagged With: acid trip, CIA, egregious product placement, kidnapping, Majorca, meta story, parody, superfan

AMBULANCE

April 9, 2022 By Leave a Comment

AMBULANCE

If Michael Bay is smart, and having a long career as, essentially, a one-trick pony, leads us to believe he must be, he will cast Olivia Stambouliah in all his films from now on. As Lieutenant Dhazghig, the crack surveillance officer in charge of keeping track of where the rogue, and eponymous subject of Bay’s… Read More »

Tagged With: ambulance, bank robbery, Birkenstock, brothers, car crash, EMT, experimental surgery, explosions, FBI, heist, LA freeway, remake

MORBIUS

March 31, 2022 By Leave a Comment

MORBIUS

Let me start with a spoiler. MORBIUS is not a good film. This grim and grimy excursion into the Marvel Universe has the special effects. It has the clash of superhero and super villain. It has a bustling metropolis (New York City) where the residents, and at least one federal agent, are quick to blame… Read More »

Tagged With: artificial blood, blood drinking, Costa Rica, Marvel Universe, MCU, New York City, triple-blessed holy water

THE BATMAN

March 19, 2022 By 4 Comments

THE BATMAN

One thing you can say about THE BATMAN without fear of contradiction is that there is a lot of it. Clocking in at three hours or so, it packs in enough plot for a trilogy, as though all concerned fretted that this might be their only shot at the rebooted DC franchise. Fear not, though.… Read More »

Tagged With: Batman, Gotham City, motocycle, open refrigerator, political corruption, superhero, vigilante justice

UNCHARTED

February 18, 2022 By Leave a Comment

UNCHARTED

UNCHARTED is like the first pitch meeting to potential financiers, which is odd since it’s been in development for almost a decade. What we have here is the broad outline of a plot full of twists, turns, and aerial stunts. What we don’t have is any sense of order or logic, even that of the… Read More »

Tagged With: Barcelona, based on a video game, heist, lost treasure, Magellan, scavenger hunt

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